During the last year I have been pretty active on the mobile dating, friending and meetup scene. I have used Tinder to Chatous and everything in-between; to name a few Hinge, Bumble, Happn, and Badoo. While I can’t say that the results were equally good across all apps, there were some underlying things I learned from my mobile adventures.
1.) Apps that promote Facebook login tend to have better quality users.
Maybe I am wrong, but several apps that did not use Facebook login seemed to have loads of bots and spam from ‘matches’ telling me to watch them on cam to random users matching and not event responding to messages. While this did happen on apps that used Facebook login as well, it seemed to be less common and at the same time I like to think that Facebook provides an extra level of assurance that the person is real.
2.) Profile pictures matter, but so does your profile
Without a doubt cleaning up and brushing your hair is definitely a good idea if you want people to swipe right on you, but from speaking to others that matched with me I realized they swiped right not only cause they found me attractive but also because of something they read in my profile. Your profile gives you an opportunity to go beyond looks and appeal to another person on another level. I believe that when people are on the fence with your picture that your profile is what pushes them over to the ‘right’ side.
3.) Ghosting and mindless chat syndrome (MCS) is real
While many users are truly looking to create new relationships or friendships there are a handful that are looking for a one night stand or that get stuck with MCS, Mindless Chat Syndrome. You can usually identify this within 2 minutes of chatting to them. The first is usually over eager to know what are you doing right now and will often send you messages at around 10pm onward. The later will usually message you constantly throughout the day with no mention of meeting up. That said as soon as your booty call seeking match realizes that you are not going to meet up with him at 1am you can expect him to Ghost even if you guys were talking during the whole week and things seemed like it was going well, and unfortunately if you are looking to meet someone IRL (in real life) you might need to ghost the MCS match.
4.) There are awesome people in the mobile scene
Before I started using mobile apps to meet people, I used to believe that people on these apps must be really lame, not have any friends, or much be desperate. That was before I realized how much easier, exciting, fun and efficient it was. I have met startup founders, band members, and even exchange students on Tinder, and the experiences were awesome. Between studying and having a part time job I rarely get the opportunity to meet people during the day and when I do have time I am so exhausted. I can’t imagine myself ever going back to trying to meet people organically or traditionally.
5.) It is pointless to wait for the other person to make the first move
I am an introvert, so as you can imagine I hate making the first move and putting myself out there. The fear of rejection is real! It is for this reason I used to eagerly wait for my match to send me the first message or request to meet up. But after a few months I realized most of us on these apps want to meet people and on top of that we have already made it past the first hurdle of matching someone. There is no logic dragging it out with stage one MCS. Send the message, meetup and see if you click. If you don’t it’s fine…there are plenty of fish in the sea.
That’s a few of the things that I have learned as an explorer of the mobile match & meet scene. Would love to hear your thoughts and 2 cents. Leave a comment behind or hit us up on Twitter.
Till next time! Ciao